


Cheater, Cheater

by commas_and_ampersands



Category: Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon | Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon, Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon | Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon (Anime & Manga)
Genre: F/M, Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-26
Updated: 2018-11-26
Packaged: 2019-08-29 23:55:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 961
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16753906
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/commas_and_ampersands/pseuds/commas_and_ampersands
Summary: "No matter what you put on this mythical sundae, the answer will continue to be no."





	Cheater, Cheater

**Author's Note:**

> Written August 2010; minor revisions October 2017

"Please, Ami?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Pretty please?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Pretty pretty please with a microscope on top?"  
  
"No matter what you put on this mythical sundae, the answer will continue to be no."  
  
This has been going on for close to an hour.  Minako has wheedled and begged and prodded, ignoring or ignorant of the fact that Ami is trying to do her own homework.  Ami reminds herself that Minako has tunnel vision when it comes to her wants, and that Ami loves her.  Most of the time.  
  
"Please, Ami?" she asks again.  "I've never asked you to do this before."  
  
"Yes, you have."  
  
"Okay, fine," Minako concedes.  "But I've never needed it as badly as I have this time!"  
  
Ami exhales sharply.  "Why do you need it so badly, Minako?  Is it because you spend more time with your boyfriend than on your schoolwork?"  
  
The guilty blush that colors Minako's cheeks is answer enough to that query.  
  
Ami sniffs primly.  
  
Minako groans.  "I know it's wrong, Ami, or at least you think it is, but he's so... SO, you know?"  
  
Ami hates trying to decipher Minako when she becomes inarticulate.  "I know you love him a ridiculous amount, if that's what you mean."  
  
"It is what I mean!" Minako chirps.  "See, Ami?  It wouldn't even really be cheating.  It would just be you writing down my thoughts for me in a way that makes sense!"  
  
"How is that not cheating?"  
  
"It's just helping!"  
  
"No, I'm pretty sure it's cheating."  
  
Minako groans and falls forward onto Ami's desk.  Her hair completely obscures Ami's homework, and probably smudges some of the work for good measure.  
  
"I know I'm annoying you, Ami, but I'm really, really desperate this time!  If I don't do well on this essay, I'll totally flunk, and Mama will totally ground me, and then I totally won't see Kunzite at all!"  
  
Ami rubs Minako's back with very little sympathy.  Mostly, she just wants to get on with this.  "Can't you just sneak out?  Not that I approve of that either, but greater and lesser evils being what they are, I'd rather you did that than cheat."  
  
Minako sniffs and raises her head.  To Ami's horror, she's actually crying.  Ami now feels guilty for upsetting her, even if Minako is being completely unreasonable.  
  
"I can't!" Minako wails.  "If he finds out I flunked, he'll say we should take a break so I can catch up."  She slams her hands on the desk, upsetting Ami's carefully organized pens.  "Why does he have to be so damned responsible?!"  
  
Because Minako is bordering on hysterical, Ami hands her a hand box of tissues.  Minako thanks her and immediately blows her nose loudly.  
  
"Do you know how frustrating it is?  I finally really fall for a guy, and he likes me back, and then he has to go and be all noble and dependable.  Why can't he just be a scatter-brained screw up like all the other boys?"  
  
Ami continues patting her friend's back.  "Minako, if he were like all the other boys, you wouldn't like him.  Or you'd be crying because he broke your heart."  
  
Minako nods, wiping at her smearing mascara.  "I know, but... this stupid essay.  It just ruined everything!"  She buries her face in the tissue.  "I don't even want to be in school anyway."  
  
Ami suppresses a shudder at this horrible sentiment.  "Minako, I know you can do it.  You're smarter than you give yourself credit for.  I'll even proofread it when you're done, but I will not write it for you."  
  
Minako peers up from above her tissue.  "Not even if I set you up with Zoisite?"  
  
The question is so out of left field that Ami cannot police her reaction.  Her face turns beet red, her mouth goes dry, and some of her skin starts to break out in hives.  
  
Minako suddenly snaps a picture of Ami's bewildered face.  Ami has no idea where she pulled the camera from.  Then the blonde leaps to her feet, crowing in triumph and dancing around Ami's bedroom.  "Yes! I knew it, I knew it, I knew it, I knew it!  Rei said I was crazy, but I proved her wrong, and Mako totally owes me money."  
  
Ami sputters, "Wh-wh-what? I--"  
  
Minako leans in, her eyes glinting in a way that convinces Ami that Rei is not kidding about people being possessed by fox spirits.  "I bet that I could get you to directly or indirectly admit that you have a crush on Zoisite, and I did it!  You blushed!  Ha!"  She pauses.  "I am sorry about the hives.  I didn't know you liked him  _that_  much."  
  
Ami knows she should not be in such shock at Minako's behavior, but she just can't help herself.  "So, this was what?  A game?  A joke?"  
  
"No, this is getting you to admit your feelings!  Ami, it's not healthy to keep them bottled up like that.  Really, I'm trying to help you!  I just happened to turn a profit at the same time."  
  
Ami's embarrassment recedes like a shrinking tide.  She jerks to her feet, grabs Minako's arm, and forcefully leads her from her room.  
  
"I know you're mad now, Ami, but trust me, you'll feel better later," Minako assures her, oblivious and bubbly.  "And don't worry, I won't tell Zoisite or even Kunzite.  Your secret is safe with me.  I won't even hint by telling them of how completely convincing my performance was.  Y ou totally believed me!"  
  
Ami gently pushes her out and makes to close the door.  
  
Minako stops it with her foot.  
  
"By the way, is that offer to proofread the essay still available?  Because I could really use the--"  
  
Ami pushes her again, less gently, and slams the door in her face.


End file.
